Category: Toxic Relationships

Three Must-Read Posts for Mother’s Day If You’re an Adult Survivor of Emotional Child Abuse

May 12, 2018

Advertisements on TV and the radio go over the top in portraying all mothers as idealized heroic women who did absolutely every single thing right. Motherhood, however, is far more complex and grittier than those bleached versions of it. It’s a vocation that, when approached right, requires maternal sacrifice, encourages a selfless love from the … More Three Must-Read Posts for Mother’s Day If You’re an Adult Survivor of Emotional Child Abuse

What Finn From ‘The Force Awakens’ and Adult Survivors of Emotional Child Abuse Have in Common

August 3, 2016

Editor’s Note: Upon reading this post, some readers may say, “Oh, it’s just a movie!” Indeed, but stories, whether in books or movies or television programs, teach us about ourselves, about what we value, about what we love, about what we hate. Recently, I rewatched the latest Star Wars film, “The Force Awakens,” and noticed … More What Finn From ‘The Force Awakens’ and Adult Survivors of Emotional Child Abuse Have in Common

From the Editor’s Mailbox: Being a Trusted Adult to Your Siblings, Going No Contact, and Why Therapy May Not Work for You

June 29, 2016

Editor’s Note: The Invisible Scar does not offer professional advice, only opinion. Here’s a look at the most common questions popping up in my inbox lately and some thoughts regarding them. My younger siblings live at home, and they’re being emotionally abused by our parents. What can I do? Call the Childhelp National Child Abuse … More From the Editor’s Mailbox: Being a Trusted Adult to Your Siblings, Going No Contact, and Why Therapy May Not Work for You

Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers [Book Review]

March 21, 2016

Some daughters grow up with a nagging sense of something not quite right in their relationship with their mothers, though the daughters can’t place their finger on what’s off exactly. It’s a vague, pervasive feeling of being unloved and ignored. They feel like somehow, in some way, the loving relationship that other people seem to … More Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers [Book Review]

Fear and Guilt Will Keep You in an Abusive Relationship If You Let Them

August 10, 2015

You’ve long suspected something is not quite normal about your relationship with your parents. Perhaps you even sought answers and read about the signs of emotional child abuse. Now, you have come to the hard, cold realization that you’ve been emotionally abused as a child—and that the abuse has extended into your adulthood. So, what … More Fear and Guilt Will Keep You in an Abusive Relationship If You Let Them

How to Find Relationships That Are Good for You and Avoid Those That Aren’t

May 22, 2015

If you are an adult survivor of emotional child abuse, you probably have a hard time differentiating the “safe” people in your life from ones that are crazy-makers or harmful to your well-being. In fact, you may not even grasp the concept of “safe people.” That’s not your fault. Raised by toxic people, you weren’t … More How to Find Relationships That Are Good for You and Avoid Those That Aren’t

The Adult Survivor: Remembering the Truth vs Longing for What Could Have Been

September 24, 2013

Some of the best content on The Invisible Scar can be found in the comments section of the various blog posts. In reading them, I’ve seen myriad themes emerging. One of the most powerful ones is an adult survivor’s longing for a loving family vs the truth of what their family is really like. The … More The Adult Survivor: Remembering the Truth vs Longing for What Could Have Been

Prepare Yourself for Backlash When Going No Contact [Advice for Adult Children]

June 27, 2013

When the adult survivor of emotional child abuse decides to take a break (whether temporary or permanent) from the birth family, that decision may come to a shock to people in their social circles. From the outside of the family circle-—and even within it, at times—everything has looked perfect, tidy, and loving. To all who … More Prepare Yourself for Backlash When Going No Contact [Advice for Adult Children]

What to Do About Father’s Day? (Ideas for Estranged Adult Children or Those With Late Abusive Fathers)

June 16, 2013

For weeks now, the Father’s Day holiday has been advertised in the United States. Images of handsome, strong, adoring fathers flash on television screens; people share photographs on social media platforms of loving fathers, godfathers, and grandfathers. But myriad adult children are estranged from their fathers or they have only painful memories of their deceased … More What to Do About Father’s Day? (Ideas for Estranged Adult Children or Those With Late Abusive Fathers)

Ending the Toxic Relationship and Giving Yourself Time and Space to Find Yourself

May 10, 2013

Some relationships are deeply damaging and unhealthy for the people within the relationship. Unlike healthy relationships, which have peaks and lows, which have struggles now and then, a toxic relationship is poison to the people involved. But what happens if the toxic relationship is within the family sphere? Imagine your daughter telling you that every time … More Ending the Toxic Relationship and Giving Yourself Time and Space to Find Yourself