You Don’t Owe Your Toxic Mother a Card, Candy, or Quality Time on Mother’s Day

Whenever you see your mother, she belittles you, emotionally abuses you, treats you like a peasant, and demands to be fawned over like a queen. After you spend time with her, whether in person or on the phone or even reading an email from her, you feel very, very tiny and insignificant. You hurt inside, … Continue reading You Don’t Owe Your Toxic Mother a Card, Candy, or Quality Time on Mother’s Day

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Soldiering On

I must've argued with myself a dozen or so times about whether I should write this post. I loathe writing about myself. But this post is really for you. See, I understand what a blog reader feels when he or she hasn't seen a new post at a favorite blog for a long time. You … Continue reading Soldiering On

Suicide: When Your Sorrow Feels Too Dark

In memory of SKB Sometimes, adult survivors of emotional child abuse feel a deepening sadness that grows heavier and heavier with time. The burden of it can feel too much to carry... and they may think about suicide. So, we need to talk about suicide... and to discuss it with compassion and without judgment. Let's … Continue reading Suicide: When Your Sorrow Feels Too Dark

From the Editor’s Mailbox: Being a Trusted Adult to Your Siblings, Going No Contact, and Why Therapy May Not Work for You

Editor's Note: The Invisible Scar does not offer professional advice, only opinion. Here's a look at the most common questions popping up in my inbox lately and some thoughts regarding them. My younger siblings live at home, and they're being emotionally abused by our parents. What can I do? Call the Childhelp National Child Abuse … Continue reading From the Editor’s Mailbox: Being a Trusted Adult to Your Siblings, Going No Contact, and Why Therapy May Not Work for You

What Really Happened: Finding Out You Had an Emotionally Abusive Childhood (and Tips for Healing)

Have you recently come to the realization that you've had an emotionally abusive childhood? If so, that awakening to the truth can be brutal. But do know that you're not alone. At The Invisible Scar, I receive tons of emails from people who have had this epiphany. And I tell them that, though this discovery … Continue reading What Really Happened: Finding Out You Had an Emotionally Abusive Childhood (and Tips for Healing)

Four Sanity-Saving Tips for Ignoring Mother’s Day

How should you celebrate Mother's Day when your mother was emotionally abusive? Short answer: You don't have to celebrate it. Short answer for adult survivors who are mothers: You celebrate your being a mom, and you reflect, pray, and learn about being a better one every day. Last year, I wrote about celebrating Mother's Day … Continue reading Four Sanity-Saving Tips for Ignoring Mother’s Day

Three-Year Blog Anniversary: Lessons From Writing About a Tough Subject, a Peek at the Creative Process & Some Music

Today is the third anniversary of The Invisible Scar. And in light of this frabjous day (callooh, callay!), I thought I'd share a little behind-the-scenes content: What I've learned in writing and running The Invisible Scar for three years The creative process for The Invisible Scar articles Favorite songs on my playlist while I write … Continue reading Three-Year Blog Anniversary: Lessons From Writing About a Tough Subject, a Peek at the Creative Process & Some Music

Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers [Book Review]

Some daughters grow up with a nagging sense of something not quite right in their relationship with their mothers, though the daughters can't place their finger on what's off exactly. It's a vague, pervasive feeling of being unloved and ignored. They feel like somehow, in some way, the loving relationship that other people seem to … Continue reading Will I Ever Be Good Enough? Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers [Book Review]

17 Excuses People Give to Avoid Going to Talk Therapy (and Why They Should Really Rethink Them)

If you've been reading the Invisible Scar articles for some time, you know that we are proponents of therapy. We don't espouse a specific psychological approach nor do we care whether you choose a psychologist, psychiatrist, therapist, or counselor. We do care about Invisible Scar readers, though, and so we repeat (often) the phrase please … Continue reading 17 Excuses People Give to Avoid Going to Talk Therapy (and Why They Should Really Rethink Them)

National Child Abuse Awareness Month: Emotional Child Abuse Is Real and Its Effects Last Long Into Adulthood

Editor's note: April is National Child Abuse Awareness and Prevention month. The Invisible Scar is dedicated to raising awareness of emotional child abuse, so in honor of this month's focus, we'll revisit the definition of emotional child abuse, types of emotional child abuse, and its effects for those who are not yet familiar with the … Continue reading National Child Abuse Awareness Month: Emotional Child Abuse Is Real and Its Effects Last Long Into Adulthood